Thailand Land of SmilesMukdahan | Thailand Land of Smiles

What Happens in Mukdahan Stays in Mukdahan

Talen — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 01:02:46 +0000

My last trip to Thailand found me splitting time between Mukdahan and Nakhon Phanom and while I enjoy both provinces, the latter of the two is my hands down favorite. Nakhon Phanom is a good sized city, the 14th largest in Thailand, but it still has a nice home town feel to it. And if you venture 5 minutes out of town in any direction you are smack dab in the middle of nowhere farm country. It is the best of both worlds, a city where there is always something to do and farm country where you can relax and watch clouds go by.

Mukdahan on the other hand has a very small town feel. Sure there are a few bars and a disco at the Mukdahan Grand but for the most part the sidewalks roll up at 7pm. But, if you are looking for a little something on the side then Mukdahan has a place or two where you can discretely take care of your needs.

I know this sounds bad, but I am only a man and while I was in Mukdahan I found myself feeling certain urges that can only be satisfied by something new. I had heard about this one particular place I could go and while I was in town with the family I had the opportunity to seek out this den of pleasure.

Luckily for me Pookie’s daughter Fa needed to go to the clinic for a follow up visit and the clinic was crowded. This gave me all the time I needed. Unfortunately young brother was left behind to keep me company, but I had a plan.

Seeing as I always have my camera with me I figured I would offer young brother a cigarette and then slowly start taking pictures of the town as I walked farther from the pickup truck. Eventually I made it to the corner and within a few steps I made it around the bend and out of sight. Now I was free to seek my pleasure and I was a man on a mission.

Of course, as things always go, I was headed in the wrong direction which I found out about a half a mile down the road. It seemed I needed to go back the way I came and I would once again need to maneuver around little brother and the clinic. Luckily I made my way back and past them all without notice. The sign told me I was heading in the right direction.

I walked for what seemed like a mile and passed more than a few beautiful women along the way. They didn’t care to speak too much but they were flirting up a storm. While they were very nice I couldn’t help but think they wouldn’t satisfy my needs. I had heard about one special woman, a woman that took what she did for a living very seriously. In fact I had heard what she could do was more of an art form than anything that could ever be considered work. I knew she was the one I had to find.

Down a few blocks and through a small side street I saw the woman I had been looking for. Unfortunately for me she was surrounded by quite a few Thai men and it looked like I would have to wait my turn. It was silly of me to think I could have her all to myself especially considering how round, firm and large her dim sum was. It was the most beautiful dim sum I had ever seen.

I didn’t have time to sit and enjoy the subtle full bodied aroma or savor the succulent sour pork. I had to get back before anyone found out what I was up to. Pookie and her Mama are wonderful cooks but after 4 days of fish for breakfast I had no choice but to seek out another woman’s skills. I was also smart enough to be discreet about my wandering palate because it wouldn’t do to upset the ladies of the house.

What? You didn’t think I was talking about something else…did you?

Going Green in Rural Thailand?

Talen — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 11:44:16 +0000

Well, not really. At best, you can hope for “out of sight, out of mind”, and then we have the oddity that is the above picture.

Rural Thai households are probably among the cleanest in the world. The floors are either concrete, tile or smooth teak and they are swept as much as three times a day. Unfortunately, for the most part, they are swept just outside the front porch and the remnants are left where they lay. Occasionally they are gathered into a pile and burned, occasionally.

At my girls family house in Mukdahan this is pretty much the case. Things are allowed to collect around the outside of the house and eventually they are gathered up and burned by the side of the house. Plastic bottles, candy wrappers, milk cartons and anything else you can think of. The process definitely goes against all reason.

And then you have the pit at the rear of the property. This pit is roughly four feet in diameter and at least 3 feet deep. The pit is filled with plastic bags, the kind used for takeout from the market. You would get chicken skewers in them or maybe sticky rice. There are at least a thousand or more plastic bags in this pit and still room for more.

Now, What the hell is this all about? I’d love to tell you but I have no clue. As I said before, and as the pictures show, trash is left to accumulate and then burned. So what is the purpose of the pit and thousands of plastic food bags?

I suppose there is a possibility that these bags would draw unwelcome guests due to lingering food smells but it seems to me that the bags have been cleaned before they were deposited here. The pit has also been open for some time and there is no apparent animal activity around it.

Perhaps I have stumbled upon the black hole of plastic food bags and I should count myself lucky that I wasn’t sucked in and transmuted into leftover tadpole guts or ant larvae. Or worse yet, a plastic bag with no apparent purpose in a pit.

If you think about it these bags must be lethal in some way. Why else would someone dig a pit specifically for these bags and no other trash? It could be a trap to lure in idiot falang such as myself. I can hear the family now…” young brother go dig a pit and put all the plastic bags you can find in it, I bet the falang will find it within an hour and start taking pictures”. This is probably the best possibility.

I’m sure you are wondering why I didn’t just ask what the pit was for? I did, and the answer was much more convoluted than I could ever possibly hope to go into here. I walked away from this knowing that the pit was important and that’s all the falang needed to know.

What I do know is that the pit was scheduled to be closed soon after I took the picture and buried with the bags would be all my unanswered questions. The only good to come of it all would be the green patch of grass growing over the once plastic void. It might be a while before anything else goes green around these parts.

So, what do you think?

Hazzards of the Hongnam

Talen — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 11:23:02 +0000

I love rural Thailand and all it has to offer, from the laid back atmosphere to the kind smiles of it’s friendly people, everything seems to mesh. That being said there are a few aspects of rural Thailand that scare the hell out of me.

For the most part you won’t be seeing too many western toilets while in rural Thailand, sure the better hotels will have them but if you are visiting the family farm , well, you better be in a squatting frame of mind.

I’ve gotten used to the morning manual showers which consist of a bucket and a big pot of cold water. I’ve even gotten used to using the squat toilet, although if any Thai ever saw me using it they would wonder just what the hell I’m doing, after they finished laughing.

The hongnam itself is an upgrade to the basic outhouse. Four concrete walls with a slanted metal roof that is more of an open air design. A pump brings running water into a tap used to fill the various pots and trashcans. One big clay jar to shower from, a smaller clay jar to flush from and various other jars and cans for washing of clothes and other secrets I have yet to uncover.

Going to the bathroom in the village is a little more involved than waking up and stumbling in. It becomes a ritual of sorts. A process where you begin with one action and move on to the next. it’s all very easy to get used to even if the morning shower is just a wee bit colder than I normally like.

What I haven’t gotten used to is the morning audience that attends these rituals. It’s nothing to look around and find a large lizard or 3 hanging about on the walls or a large hairy spider hanging out on the ceiling. At least they make themselves known. It’s the unknown that I fear, and for good reason.

After a little thought, not like there is anything else to do while squatting, you realize that if they can get in then it’s not to much of a stretch to get a snake in the loo too. Of course that is not the proper mindset to have and not something you want to be thinking about with your ass end hanging over the porcelain pit.

Last week I realized just why I should fear the unknown. I called my girl as I usually do and when she answered we had the following conversation:

Me: Hi teelac how are you?

Teelac: Not good teelac I have problem again.

Me: What wrong Teelac?

Teelac: I live in hospital again.

Me: Why?!?!? What happened?

Teelac: I go hongnam teelac and saanake bite me.

Me: Teelac you ok? What doctor say: Big snake? Little snake? Poisonous?

Teelac: Doctor say I have to stay tonight so they can look me. Have big where snake bite me but it get small now.

Me: Where did you get bite?

Teelac: I not know how to say in englit.

Me: Your ass?

Teelac: No! not in doot.

Teelac: I get bite on hand but not hand.

Me: Ah you got bit on finger?

Teelac: Yes teelac finnnger…I think next time have bite on top ( breasts ) I need big there

She spent the night in the hospital. Not knowing what kind of snake bit her they didn’t want to take any chances and wanted to keep an eye on her. Fortunately she is fine. As for me, I think the person that came up with ” when in Rome” should be shot. From now on I’ll be well armed before using the hongnam…or I’ll be buying diapers.

Kieng Piman Hotel in Mukdahan

Talen — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 01:07:09 +0000

Although Mukdahan is a small city it has quite a few decent hotels and the Kieng Piman is definitely one of the better ones suited to westerners traveling through town.

The hotel is a more modern hotel but it has a few years on it. The rooms were nice but more towards the spartan style with not much going on. Each room has a small balcony either overlooking the parking lot in the front of the hotel or the wholesale night market at the rear of the hotel.

I stayed in the standard room which runs 500 baht a night. The room was very clean and the bathroom was well stocked with soaps and shampoo’s. While there are several nicer hotels in town, such as the Mukdahan Grand, they are also a lot more expensive starting at 1000 baht a night. For the price the Kieng Piman just couldn’t be beat unless you were to stay in a normal Thai hotel which would be very sparse and have squat toilets.

There is a restaurant on the premises and it looked very nice but I never had a chance to eat there. The hotel also provides room service until 11pm. The restaurant area also provides free wifi by cyberpoint but if you need wifi in your room you’ll have to buy minutes that start at 50 baht for one hour.

The Kieng Piman Hotel in Mukdahan is conveniently located in downtown Mukdahan. It is about 5 minutes walk from the Mekong River and Indochina Market (Danang Market) which has local foods, clothes and fruits.

All in all the Kieng Piman was a very nice hotel to stay in and everyone from the front desk personel to the maids made sure that the time I spent there was enjoyable.

The Family Farm

Talen — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 01:27:17 +0000

As I said in an earlier post, Pookie’s family splits their time between 2 houses. One in Mukdahan province and the other in Nakhon Phanom. The house in Mukdahan is owned by pookies parents and has no farm land attached to it. The house in Nakhon Phanom is Pookie’s Aunts house that has been handed down through the family and has about 4 acres of farm land attached.

Normally the family would be shuttling back and forth during the planting and harvest seasons to help out in the fields but over the past year they have been spending an increasing amount of time in Nakhon Phanom. Unfortunately Pookie’s father decided it was time to have a girlfriend and mama is none to happy about that. Plans have been made to make the move to Nakhon Phanom permanent. To this end the house in Mukdahan will be getting a makeover. The bottom of the traditional Thai house which is concrete will remain but the top of the house which is made of teak will be removed and carted to Nakhon Phanom where it will be re-built. Endings are messy no matter what culture you are from.

For now the family house in Nakhon Phanom can accomodate everyone quite well. It’s a large house built of teak in the traditional Thai manner. Storage area’s and sitting area’s under the house and the main living quarters above. The living area has a bathroom, kitchen, 2 private bedrooms and a modest living area. The floors are amazingly beautiful teak that the pictures just don’t do justice. Though beautiful they are also rather on the thin side so any falang of decent size, such as myself, has to walk slowly and softly while upstairs.

The house is kept very nice and the only clutter is all the stuff we brought with us to Nakhon Phanom …and a considerable amount of clutter was brought. Aside from the various pillows and blankets we also had to load up the karaoke system and the stereo. Most everything in the house was made by the family and they are very proud of that fact as they should be. And if there is any question on which shirt color they side with one only needs to look at the walls to see Thaksin’s photo’s in a place of honor next to the King and Queen.

Although Nakhon Phanom seems to be home for now there is still shuttling between Nakhon Phanom and Mukdahan due to the fact that little brother still has school in Mukdahan and he needs to be checked on to make sure he actually goes. Hopefully the pictures bring out the real beauty of the family house in Nakhon Phanom even if it doesn’t quite measure up toi western standards.

I’ve had several readers ask me in the past few weeks why I talk about the family house in Mukdahan one day and the family house in Nakhon Phanom the next. I guess I left out a few details so this should clear that up until next time when it’s changed again…this is Thailand we are talking about

Once I get things sorted I’ll post a large galley of all the Traditional house and farm pics I have.

Little Brothers New Room

Talen — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 01:06:37 +0000

When I go up country to see Pookie’s family in Issan we always head to Mukdahan first where her parents live , although technically they live in Nakhon Phanom as well but that is a story for tomorrow. Each time I see the house in Mukdahan there is a new addition and this last trip was no different.

The main house is a standard village house with concrete floors and walls on the first floor and the second floor built out of teak. The first floor serves as living room/bedroom for the kids, kitchen area and storage areas. The second floor is all for Mama and Papa. This means that the living room area becomes a bedroom at night for the children. They lay out their mats and thats where they sleep on the concrete floor.

Well, it seems little brother, who is 16, decided he needed a little more privacy so a little hut was built on the side of the house for him. I thought it odd at first that he would have a place separate from the family and honestly I still think it odd. The only private rooms in a rural Thai house seem to be for the parents/grandparents. Pookie has another brother who is 18 and even he still sleeps with the family.

Either way he seems to be putting his new room to good use as you can tell by the beer bottles lined up by the door and the new addition of a table by his front porch. It’s a good thing he’s a small lad and not claustrophobic at all.

I’m really hoping my dollar goes a little further when I do make the move to Thailand…but if the house comes with beer there might be room for negotiations.

Thailand Land of SmilesMukdahan | Thailand Land of Smiles

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